I am here to teach social media and marketing, these things I do daily and I love it…..
But when I ask people ‘what do you want to know, what’s your biggest challenge?’ You know what I get over and over…. how do you do it? ‘Do what?’ I ask, how do you do career AND have a family with four kids?!
Often I meet someone for the first time and when we get to the kids part of the conversation the jaw drops, WHAT!? then comes the mixture of what I’m certain is admiration and judgement – or is that just me?
I met a dear friend just recently who sat across from me and hung her head with tears in her eyes and asked me to please tell her how to run a business and be a good mum because she was really struggling. Her comment was, ‘I watch all those other mums and you and I feel like I’m doing such a terrible job, how do you do it?’ I reached over, hugged her and told her what I’m going to tell you now.
10 steps to being the perfect Supermom
- Get up, look in the mirror. Be disgusted at the growing lines on my face and bags under my eyes, so use expensive ‘anti ageing they don’t really work creams’ …. then drink a lot of coffee. I mean the bucket size because Grande just isn’t going to cut it.
- Spend the next hour of my morning thinking (in between yelling ‘get your shoes, are you wearing underwear? and no you can’t take your money box for show and tell today’) tomorrow Ill get a better routine and have a relaxed start to the day.
- Get to the office, shake my head at the state of my car (now commonly referred to as the ‘Sampit’) and swear to fix it on the weekend.
- Ring Greg to tell him I love him so I know I have done SOME good mummying/partnering for the morning just in case I don’t improve for the rest of the day. Ill tell the kids when I pick them up….
- Get through the day with constant reminders to myself that I have a lot of improving to do if I’m going to raise well balanced humans AND have a career.
- Pick up my gorgeous people and internally beat myself up a little more because I wasn’t there for parent help today, I forgot to return yesterdays school reader and I have another stern word from a teacher about behavior from one of them that really needs addressing.
- Get home and swear to myself (in-between making dinner and barking bedtime/homework orders) that tomorrow is going to be more organised and super mum will be the order of the day
- Fall asleep halfway through story time
- Slip into their rooms while they sleep and whisper to them how much I love them, how amazing they are and remind myself that no one today called me a bad mum, no one told me I’m doing a bad job. This is the point when I realise I heard this constantly today because I told MYSELF those things. My internal voice needs to be told in no uncertain terms to pipe down because I am officially my biggest critic.
I’m betting that 90% of the mums that read this (I secretly hope more) spend most if not all of their working life beating themselves up because they can do it better and pegging themselves against that mum over there with the perfect hair, no runner in her stockings and no lines around her eyes.
But let me tell you a little secret, we are ALL pegging ourselves against each other when realistically, our kids are lucky to have mums that care enough to WANT to improve.
So scrap the previous plan and I have simplified things for you.
3 easy steps to being a real mum;
- Love them, love yourself
- Celebrate your successes
- Be human, not perfect
oh, and drink coffee 😉
How do I do it? I DON’T do it, I survive, but I commit to enjoy the ride whatever that brings. I will show my kids that career and family can be done, but they can’t be balanced perfectly. Does that make it bad to have both, NO! Just as long as you can accept the above.
Now pat yourself on the back, cuddle your kids and kiss your someone special (pets count) because you are amazing.